Settling In
February 5, 2010
Oh HAI there! Did you miss me? I missed you all so much!
Things have been a crazy whirlwind since we got back from Pakistani WEEKS ago! Can you believe it’s been that long already? First there was unpacking, then there was trying to prepare the house for my brother-in-law to move in ten days later, and then I also have another professional hurdle I’ve been toiling day and night to try and finish (or re-finish, as it were.)
Anyway, so the adjustment with the brother-in-law (we’re calling him Chachoo, remember ?) is going well. REALLY well, better than I could have imagined. He is such a nice, sweet and fun guy that it’s actually been really fun and enjoyable having him around! Plus, he spends a considerable amount of time downstairs – where his room is – studying and/or talking to his new wife on the phone/computer. That means that M, the baby, and I still get some time to spend together as a little nuclear family on the main level where all our general living space is – just like we used to. (Contrast that to when my mother-in-law is visiting: she sleeps in a guest room on the same level as us so there is less separation and more adjustments to be made.) Also, Chachoo is here for his Ph.D. studies, so he’s got a lot on his own plate that keeps him busy. He has classes to go to and he’s working for his professor and he still has to pursue his own research as well. He’s got his own life going, and sometimes I barely see him all day.
When I DO see him, he’s just the kindest, most considerate guy. When I told people that he would be moving in with us, I got a lot of people saying that things were probably not going to be good. I think that someone even commented on this blog that I would likely be expected to do all of the brother-in-law’s cooking and cleaning and laundry. I knew, even back then, that wouldn’t be the case because I don’t even do all the cooking, cleaning or laundry when my mother-in-law is staying with us! But I was still surprised when, after only being in our house for 16 hours, Chachoo came upstairs the morning after his arrival and said to me “Bhabhi, do you want some tea?” What a sweet, sweet boy. My mother-in-law really did a good job raising those sons of hers.
The last weeks have been very busy though, and Chachoo and I have spent a lot of time running all sorts of various errands. It’s rough work coming to America and there were way too many forms to fill out, lines to stand in, and peons we had to schmooze. M says its much more complicated than when he came here for the exact same reason 10 years ago. First to get him a driver’s license, then to jump through a million hoops with his school registration (some of which they STILL aren’t satisfied with) and then we even had to go to the county health department for a chest x-ray because he comes from a tuberculos-eriffic country. That was a splendid afternoon. And all the while – on all of these outings – I’m barraging him with tidbits and info and anecdotes about American culture and history. Dragging him to the mall and the grocery stores and desi stores and international markets where we buy the weird vegetables. I sometimes wonder if he’d wish I’d just shut the heck up sometimes.
We’ve also been traipsing around the country visiting various relatives – two full weekends spent sleeping on the floor in various extended Pakistani family member’s homes. Even those trips were more fun with Chachoo around. M can get a bit curmudgeonly and old-man-like and complain-y about these kinds of trips (the driving! the family politics!), but he was much more fun to be around now that his little brother is here with us on these trips. Plus, we brought a ludo game back with us and it’s like we’ve been conducting our own traveling, interstate ludo championships. M has been the clear frontrunner by far. I am dead last, even though it seems almost identical to a game I played a lot growing up called “Sorry!”
Don’t worry though, I do plan to pick back up with the stories from our Pakistan trip. We’re not even halfway through the wedding part and there’s a lot more I want to tell you about. Things are going to be pretty busy around here for the next two weeks, but I’ll try to be consistent about sneaking back here to continue with our travel diary. Thanks for sticking around!
Now to go figure out where we left off…
